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  • Courtney Esther

Why you are stuck

We have all heard the phrase "when you know better, do better"; so why are we ineffective at implementing?



We all hit a point in our lives where we feel like something needs to change. Maybe you feel general unease; maybe you're overweight; maybe you do not feel satisfied in your job, relationship, or social life. Perhaps you are holding onto some past trauma and you realize it is still impacting you. So you are ready to grow or change, now what?



Most of us learn the necessary information


“In any given moment we have two options: to step forward into growth or step back into safety.” - Abraham Maslow

We live in a digital age full of access to information. We have a plenitude of self-help resources from books to podcasts to YouTube videos. You can learn how to improve your health, wealth, time management, career, or love life. The problem is, we keep hearing the message repeatedly yet we are not (consistently) implementing the tricks and tools into our own lives. Why?



You are stuck in the past


We all have narratives about life that we formed as children. We have beliefs and opinions about ourselves and about how the worlds works. Here is the catch: your beliefs and opinions are just that, beliefs and opinions; and beliefs and opinions can be changed. We often subconsciously self-sabotage because we lack belief in ourselves and our worth. We hear the same information over and over again about how to improve our lives and yet we make excuses and do not follow through with sustainable changes. We are stuck in our mindset and therefore our growth. It is possible to change, but first we have to break free from our old beliefs and that requires repetition.



Repetition is key


“It is not the mountain we conquer but ourselves.” - Sir Edmund Hillary

You hear repeatedly about personal development, commitment, and consistency but one day it will all finally click. It did for me and it will for you too. It takes time to retrain the brain. Somewhere deep down you truly believe the narratives you formed as a child so when you try to form new beliefs about self-worth, money, relationships, etc. you are fighting years of programming in your brain. So often we listen to information over and over and over again but do not fully implement it. The key is to keep listening to the new messages over and over and over and over again until they are louder and stronger than the old beliefs.


Get Inspired


What are your goals? What are you trying to add to your life and what are you trying to release? What kind of life do you envision for yourself? What kind of person do you want to be? Find coaches and mentors who can help you get clear on your dreams and goals. Break your goals down into small manageable actions. Who are the people doing what you want to do? Find people who have achieved goals you have; find people who hold the mindset you strive for; find people who live a lifestyle you admire. Then immerse yourself in the lives of those people: spend time with them if possible, go to their conferences, read their books, listen to their podcasts, watch their YouTube channels and read their blogs. Surround yourself with people who support you and your goals, people who encourage you to do more. The consistency does not have to be in implementing the changes, just in hearing the messages. I promise if you hear the message enough times you will eventually start implementing the changes and it will snowball (in the best of ways) from there.

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